Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
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