White coat. Heels.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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