you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
How's work?
Spinning.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
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