I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
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