he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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