Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
