I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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