Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
