No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
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