Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
