she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
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