then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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