2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
