We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
