and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
