Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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