So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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