Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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