your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
