i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
