Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
