Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Randomize
