i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
