i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
