i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
