In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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