just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
nutella sex= disaster
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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