That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Randomize
