I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
