does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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