So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
