I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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