I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
I came so hard my ears popped.
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