Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
