I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize
