I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize