"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
