Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I hope mine doesn't look like that
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Randomize
