just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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