You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
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