The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Just cropdusted the office
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
