I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Randomize
