sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
