My pussy is not your playground.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
