Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Randomize
