my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
The power of my boobs compel you
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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