It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
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