It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
