remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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