The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Randomize
